Last wednesday (Sept 28), I got my first answered prayer since a month ago. If you've been following me so far, I turned to Jesus again because I'm in need of a better job, nothing more. And long story short, I got what I asked for. My prayer was for God to give me the job that I want and be able to start immediately, and it is exactly what happened. Next week (Oct 3) I'll be starting on my new work. As I reflect on this, I again remember Matthew 6:33 and it is becoming my favorite verse so far.
Jesus said to me, "I told you so." The verse is saying that I should seek Him first and all things shall be added to me. Jesus truly delivered what He promised. At first, I was seeking what He can do for me. Then I realized through the verse that I should seek the Giver and not what He can give. Honestly, if you ask me how I did it, I don't have a clear answer yet but I tried my best to keep my focus on Him alone. Of course I still continued to pray and ask for what I need. At times, doubt creeps in my mind and begins to worry. What I do is close my eyes and I ask Jesus to calm me down, take away my doubts and worries, and help me keep my focus on Him. Here I am, I just got my first of many. Truly if you seek Him first, all things shall be added on to you.
Usually, my problem when I already receive what I prayed for is I begin to again turn my back from Jesus. My prayer Lord is that you continue to help keep my eyes on You. I don't want to revert back again to my old self. THANK YOU JESUS, AMEN.
Friday, September 30, 2016
Tuesday, September 27, 2016
God proved me wrong
When I began this journey, the only thing on my mind was I needed God because I'm in need. Then thougths about all of my wrong doings (or sins) starts hunting me. I kept asking myself if God could still forgive and how can I ask for His forgiveness. Then during one sunday at CCF, the message fit me perfectly. It is about the adulterous woman and how Jesus showed His grace (John 8:1-11). Afterwards, I kept on putting myself in the shoes of that woman and it showed some wonderful revelations to me.
Firstly, my first post in this blog was about why I don't want to join a Dgroup because I don't want to be criticized. Initially, I thought they would never do that because they are Christians. Then this verse made me realize that they will not condemn me because they have sinned as well. That makes them unqualified as termed by the speaker. I found security in this verse and was proven wrong.
Secondly, I also felt that the reason why I'm going through all these hardships is because God is condemning me since I'm far from Him. Well it could be true because He said it, "those who does not believe in Him stands condemned already." However, I realized that it is me who is condemning myself, and not God, by standing far away from Him. If I draw near and believe in Him, I will not be condemned like what He said to the woman. Since the woman believed in Jesus, she was not condemned.
Finally, I decerned that God already did His part by not condemning and now I should do my part. He said to the woman at the end, "sin no more," This already speaks for itself.
As I read the Bible, God is definitely talking to me. My attitude right now is listen. AMEN.
Firstly, my first post in this blog was about why I don't want to join a Dgroup because I don't want to be criticized. Initially, I thought they would never do that because they are Christians. Then this verse made me realize that they will not condemn me because they have sinned as well. That makes them unqualified as termed by the speaker. I found security in this verse and was proven wrong.
Secondly, I also felt that the reason why I'm going through all these hardships is because God is condemning me since I'm far from Him. Well it could be true because He said it, "those who does not believe in Him stands condemned already." However, I realized that it is me who is condemning myself, and not God, by standing far away from Him. If I draw near and believe in Him, I will not be condemned like what He said to the woman. Since the woman believed in Jesus, she was not condemned.
Finally, I decerned that God already did His part by not condemning and now I should do my part. He said to the woman at the end, "sin no more," This already speaks for itself.
As I read the Bible, God is definitely talking to me. My attitude right now is listen. AMEN.
Monday, September 26, 2016
God's "ninja moves"
It's only been a month since we started this journey to heaven. If you ask me, I have my personal reasons why I did it, but I never imagined that it is God's work. I often hear this from other Christians - "nothing in this world is accidental, it is always God's work or will." At the beginning I would like to believe that it was but I was skeptic. Yes, it could be God's work. But I also believe that I came looking for God again in my own will because I'm in need again. Since the beginning, I already consider it as selfish, but that's my reality. Although I'm a bit skeptic, I forced myself to be optimistic. Just go with flow and see where it takes me. I will take whatever comes my way. Then this verse was along that way, John 6:44 - "“No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them, and I will raise them up at the last day (NIV)." Am I being drawn by God to come to Jesus? Could be.
Just recently I am reflecting on how things in the past month had happened. I resigned from my work as a nurse and went looking for a better one. When I'm not yet with the group, I was optimistic that I could find what I'm looking for, then I realized that there isn't much opportunity out there for a nurse other than inside a hospital. Growing anxious and worried, I remembered God again. I said to myself, if I win back the favor of God, it could work to my advantage. If not, I had nothing to lose because I don't have anything to begin with. So I gave it a shot.
My resignation is not a well thought of decision. At the beginning I thought of taking it back because I can't afford to be jobless at all. I have no savings to support me and my family. But I stuck with it. Could an unwise decision be God's way to draw me back? With John 6:44, I am starting to believe it to be so. I always hear people say God moves in mysterious ways. In this case, God is performing His own version of a ninja move on me. When I filed my resignation letter, I never thought that I would be turning to God. For all I know, I will just be looking for another job that pays better. Joining a Dgroup and reading the Bible again was never in the agenda. But it happened. Is it still my will, could be. I could still say no if I want to. Is it God's will? More likely so.
Who could have given me the idea to resign without any reason and giving much thought about it? Resigning from work is a big decision and doing it without thought is foolish but it doesn't mean God cannot allow it happen if He is planning something great for me. I'm also thinking, what if I didn't resigned? Could God still have lead me to where I am now? Maybe be, but more likely not. I realized that, although our situation in the family is not what I dreamed of and far less ideal, we were okay and we were like it for many years. So, as I have mentioned, there's really no reason for me to leave my work or seek Jesus. So it must be Him.
I am truly glad that I realized that as I write this entry in my journal. God did a ninja move on me. He had placed the idea, without me even knowing it, to quit my work so that He could draw me back again to Jesus. Leaving work created a need in me, without it, I would never have turned my eyes to our Lord. It is true, indeed, that God draws people closer to Him and Jesus and not just mere accidental. The question for me now, will I follow4. Answer, absolutely. I am not sure what is instored for me but I know will not let me down. All I have to do is to trust, listen, and obey. AMEN.
Just recently I am reflecting on how things in the past month had happened. I resigned from my work as a nurse and went looking for a better one. When I'm not yet with the group, I was optimistic that I could find what I'm looking for, then I realized that there isn't much opportunity out there for a nurse other than inside a hospital. Growing anxious and worried, I remembered God again. I said to myself, if I win back the favor of God, it could work to my advantage. If not, I had nothing to lose because I don't have anything to begin with. So I gave it a shot.
My resignation is not a well thought of decision. At the beginning I thought of taking it back because I can't afford to be jobless at all. I have no savings to support me and my family. But I stuck with it. Could an unwise decision be God's way to draw me back? With John 6:44, I am starting to believe it to be so. I always hear people say God moves in mysterious ways. In this case, God is performing His own version of a ninja move on me. When I filed my resignation letter, I never thought that I would be turning to God. For all I know, I will just be looking for another job that pays better. Joining a Dgroup and reading the Bible again was never in the agenda. But it happened. Is it still my will, could be. I could still say no if I want to. Is it God's will? More likely so.
Who could have given me the idea to resign without any reason and giving much thought about it? Resigning from work is a big decision and doing it without thought is foolish but it doesn't mean God cannot allow it happen if He is planning something great for me. I'm also thinking, what if I didn't resigned? Could God still have lead me to where I am now? Maybe be, but more likely not. I realized that, although our situation in the family is not what I dreamed of and far less ideal, we were okay and we were like it for many years. So, as I have mentioned, there's really no reason for me to leave my work or seek Jesus. So it must be Him.
I am truly glad that I realized that as I write this entry in my journal. God did a ninja move on me. He had placed the idea, without me even knowing it, to quit my work so that He could draw me back again to Jesus. Leaving work created a need in me, without it, I would never have turned my eyes to our Lord. It is true, indeed, that God draws people closer to Him and Jesus and not just mere accidental. The question for me now, will I follow4. Answer, absolutely. I am not sure what is instored for me but I know will not let me down. All I have to do is to trust, listen, and obey. AMEN.
My Forgiveness
When I read the Bible again for the first time in a long while, I stopped at the verse of John 3:20. How it fits my reason why we do not want to join a Dgroup. And after our first meeting, one of my immediate thoughts were my sins. We shared one or two with the group and asked myself if God could still forgive me and my wife. Everytime I prayed since then, I would always asked for forgiveness. I also include in my prayers if God could still give me a way to redeem myself for what I have done, although, I could no longer take it back.
Then I saw the verse of John 3:18 - "Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son (NIV)." I missed this verse when I was writing about John 3:20. I originally planned on reflecting about the famous John 3:16 but it lead me to verse 18. Then I thought this might be God's way of saying He forgives my sins for as long as I believe in Him genuinely.
This is where I have to be really careful. I should believe in Him to the fullest of its definition. I should not be halfhearted or else my forgiveness might just be halfhearted as well. I know God doesn't forgive lacklusterly but to receive His forgiveness fully, I should believe in Him fully as well. This is what the verse reveals to me. I can assure myself that our Lord will forgive me and my wife for as long as we believe in Him truly. My belief in Him is my forgiveness. AMEN.
Then I saw the verse of John 3:18 - "Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son (NIV)." I missed this verse when I was writing about John 3:20. I originally planned on reflecting about the famous John 3:16 but it lead me to verse 18. Then I thought this might be God's way of saying He forgives my sins for as long as I believe in Him genuinely.
This is where I have to be really careful. I should believe in Him to the fullest of its definition. I should not be halfhearted or else my forgiveness might just be halfhearted as well. I know God doesn't forgive lacklusterly but to receive His forgiveness fully, I should believe in Him fully as well. This is what the verse reveals to me. I can assure myself that our Lord will forgive me and my wife for as long as we believe in Him truly. My belief in Him is my forgiveness. AMEN.
Sunday, September 25, 2016
The Big WHY?
It's been almost a month now since my wife and I started attending a Dgroup. It has been working for us just fine. My fears of condemnation was quickly alleviated, although I'm still not that comfortable sharing some informations that normally I will keep as a secret. No miracles yet or huge transformation in ourselves and lives but so far, we've been happy and truly learned and realized a lot of things. Somehow I could say that I should have done this a long time ago instead of just now.
On my previous post, I discussed why not. Now I will share why. At first I will admit it was a selfish reason and God quickly made me realized that. Prior to joining the group, I resigned from work to find a better one. At first I was optimistic that I could indeed find something better. But as my last day became nearer, worry and anxiety started to grow. So I thought if I would come to God, He would provide me a new job. If I would do God a favor, He would return it. A sort of win-win solution. One can also say, I'm in need so I needed God. Again, selfish isn't it? Nevertheless, it is all that I have at the beginning. It then hit me.
I immediately remembered Matthew 6:33, "But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well (NIV)." One of my usual complains about God is that I don't hear Him or He doesn't speak to me. If this is God talking to me, He wasted no time at all to speak to me. He quickly corrected my wrong intentions. I should be seeking Him first or just Him alone and not the things He can do for me.
Even so, this is always easier said than done for me. Seeking God first is one thing, His provisions is another, especially for me who's patience is next to none. From what I know and hear, it takes a person's lifetime to seek His kingdom and I'm just beginning again. I did this before and failed. Consistency is definitely in question. Add to that, most of my needs I consider are immediate. Bills, groceries, tuition, etc. These are needs that we often struggle to meet. Often my question is how long do I have to seek His kingdom for me to receive His blessings. This is where I have to change if I want a full life. I have to seek Him first and don't focus on anything in return. In addition, I've read the whole passage and God is telling me not to worry. Worrying only undermines His ability to provide. It is like questioning God. We know what happens if we question our parents or boses, what more our Lord. It will not be a pretty sight to see.
As a response, if the Lord is indeed talking to me, I will listen. Moreso, I will obey and not worry. I will focus on Him alone and not on what He can do for me. This will be challenging because I am still in need. Despite that, I will completely and to the best of my ability put my faith on to the Lord. AMEN.
On my previous post, I discussed why not. Now I will share why. At first I will admit it was a selfish reason and God quickly made me realized that. Prior to joining the group, I resigned from work to find a better one. At first I was optimistic that I could indeed find something better. But as my last day became nearer, worry and anxiety started to grow. So I thought if I would come to God, He would provide me a new job. If I would do God a favor, He would return it. A sort of win-win solution. One can also say, I'm in need so I needed God. Again, selfish isn't it? Nevertheless, it is all that I have at the beginning. It then hit me.
I immediately remembered Matthew 6:33, "But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well (NIV)." One of my usual complains about God is that I don't hear Him or He doesn't speak to me. If this is God talking to me, He wasted no time at all to speak to me. He quickly corrected my wrong intentions. I should be seeking Him first or just Him alone and not the things He can do for me.
Even so, this is always easier said than done for me. Seeking God first is one thing, His provisions is another, especially for me who's patience is next to none. From what I know and hear, it takes a person's lifetime to seek His kingdom and I'm just beginning again. I did this before and failed. Consistency is definitely in question. Add to that, most of my needs I consider are immediate. Bills, groceries, tuition, etc. These are needs that we often struggle to meet. Often my question is how long do I have to seek His kingdom for me to receive His blessings. This is where I have to change if I want a full life. I have to seek Him first and don't focus on anything in return. In addition, I've read the whole passage and God is telling me not to worry. Worrying only undermines His ability to provide. It is like questioning God. We know what happens if we question our parents or boses, what more our Lord. It will not be a pretty sight to see.
As a response, if the Lord is indeed talking to me, I will listen. Moreso, I will obey and not worry. I will focus on Him alone and not on what He can do for me. This will be challenging because I am still in need. Despite that, I will completely and to the best of my ability put my faith on to the Lord. AMEN.
Saturday, September 24, 2016
BOOK OF JOHN - MY STARTING POINT
My Dgroup leader instructed me to read the Bible and begin with the Gospel of John. Why John? I honestly don't know but I'm pretty sure I'll be able to find out why if I obey. So, this will be my starting point. I have read the Bible before but not in its entirety. So this will be my first attempt, after a long while, to read the Bible from cover to cover.
After reading a couple of chapters, I stumble upon this verse, John 3:20 - "Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed (NIV)." It struct me and here's why.
About a month ago, out of sponteneity, I joined a Dgroup in CCF. I will share my reasons why on a separate post, but for now, I will focus on why I prevent myself from joining in the first place. It is because I do not want my evil deeds to be exposed like a criminal that doesn't want to be caught. I could think of other reasons, however, this one is on the very top. I do not want others to know it for the fear of being condemned. At the back of my mind I know people in a Dgroup or in church will never do that or else their faith will be in question. Nevertheless, I just couldn't help it.
I've commited some serious sins in my life, the worst probably is abortion. I influenced my wife, who was still my girlfriend then, to commit abortion just to cover yet another sin; that we are engaging in pre-marital sex. Up to the time when I joined the group, no one knew about it. It is my wife's and I little secret. My concern mostly is not it being exposed but the things that people might or will say once they found out. I am more keen to protect my image or reputation than my eternal welfare.
On the other hand, I do not want to say that I hate God. Nonetheless, how can I say I love Him if I engage in sinful acts willfully or unwillfully. The worst part of it is, I don't feel any guilt about it. The fact that I don't feel any remorse when we commited abortion is an evidence that I've been living in darknest. If I'm in the light, I could have at least felt bad, but none.
Therefore, this time, I am moving into the light. If my evil deeds will be exposed, so be it. It is something that I just have to live with. A part of me is saying it is my consequence or punishment but I would like to believe as well it could also be my blessing. It's only been a month when I started this journey. I could still honestly say I don't feel guilty with what I did. Is it because I simply just don't know how or it is because my heart was hardened by sin, probably the latter. My prayer is that as I continue to read His word, He would slowly reveal Himself to me. He would crush my heart to finally feel His presence and repentance for my sins. AMEN.
After reading a couple of chapters, I stumble upon this verse, John 3:20 - "Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed (NIV)." It struct me and here's why.
About a month ago, out of sponteneity, I joined a Dgroup in CCF. I will share my reasons why on a separate post, but for now, I will focus on why I prevent myself from joining in the first place. It is because I do not want my evil deeds to be exposed like a criminal that doesn't want to be caught. I could think of other reasons, however, this one is on the very top. I do not want others to know it for the fear of being condemned. At the back of my mind I know people in a Dgroup or in church will never do that or else their faith will be in question. Nevertheless, I just couldn't help it.
I've commited some serious sins in my life, the worst probably is abortion. I influenced my wife, who was still my girlfriend then, to commit abortion just to cover yet another sin; that we are engaging in pre-marital sex. Up to the time when I joined the group, no one knew about it. It is my wife's and I little secret. My concern mostly is not it being exposed but the things that people might or will say once they found out. I am more keen to protect my image or reputation than my eternal welfare.
On the other hand, I do not want to say that I hate God. Nonetheless, how can I say I love Him if I engage in sinful acts willfully or unwillfully. The worst part of it is, I don't feel any guilt about it. The fact that I don't feel any remorse when we commited abortion is an evidence that I've been living in darknest. If I'm in the light, I could have at least felt bad, but none.
Therefore, this time, I am moving into the light. If my evil deeds will be exposed, so be it. It is something that I just have to live with. A part of me is saying it is my consequence or punishment but I would like to believe as well it could also be my blessing. It's only been a month when I started this journey. I could still honestly say I don't feel guilty with what I did. Is it because I simply just don't know how or it is because my heart was hardened by sin, probably the latter. My prayer is that as I continue to read His word, He would slowly reveal Himself to me. He would crush my heart to finally feel His presence and repentance for my sins. AMEN.
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